Wasting Time

Well wow, I feel like I just wasted a week for nothing. My father in law passed away and I was home going to be doing things for my fiance like driving her places. I took her one place and sat on my ass the three days doing completely nothing. The funeral is not until April 6 so that means I will have to take another day off work. I have next week off as well (vacation time I had to use) and I want to do something either on my own or ..well I guess it will be on my own then.
Thinking now would be the perfect time to get a tattoo, but which one as I have so many ideas. There is the galaxy with a death star on my left fore arm, the Bantha skull on my left leg or Empire symbol on my back…I could get all 3 but then again do I really want that many star wars tattoos?? Guess time will tell if I get them.
OMG for some reason everything has either been stressing me out or pissing me off with no happy medium. I have no idea why either Maybe cause I am not living my life as I should or want to, and I don’t know maybe just being led my other peoples actions.
Have to go out for my fiances birthday supper tonight. Of course I would love to go see my friends band play but will be late (fuck I sound like an old man), plus will have to go up and down stairs. Maybe next time.
Well that’s it for my ramblings this morning. Guess I should get back to laundry and coffee
ciao xo

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Clearing my Head

OK so yeah my father in law passed away Tuesday morning. Thankfully my fiance didn’t freak out as much as I feared she would. She and her fathers girlfriend are still making arrangements for the funeral and well etc…At least he doesn’t have a house to go through anymore as it was torn down last year.
So I am now me bereavement leave and this will extend into my holidays (next week) means I have no idea when I will be getting a new tattoo next week (there’s always the weekend I suppose.
I think that everything I wanted emptied from my head.
ciao xo

Happy Monday lol

That only happens if and when I am not working. Was a busy day running around yesterday and when everything was done, and everyone was home I was completely exhausted.

Started my oldest daughter slept in and I have to go to her place, pick her up and take her to work. When I got back my fiancé wanted me to drive her to get her prescription filled (she still has anxiety issues; so won’t drive). Once done there we went and did our weekly groceries. After we got back she wanted to go see her father at the hospital where seriously he’s just laying there waiting to pass away. Once we were home again, I had to go pick up my youngest daughter as she was visiting my parents. Had supper and by 730 I was done for the day.

Of course once I was in bed my x-MIL decided she had iphine questions to ask me…I think it was almost 9 when I finally fell asleep and I really didn’t want to get up this morning as I think I am fighting a cold (sore throat).

Now I am here with the idiots at work being ignore (which isn’t bad at times), just counting the hours till I get to go home.

Me

Long story short I don’t feel I’m living my life the best I can. I’ve had a bad 3 months now. Sure 2 months not being able to do anything on my own due to s broken knee; and now dealing with a depressed/anxiety ridden fiancé. Who make me feel like I have to hold her hand for everything. I’m going to guess the week I’m off I’ll have to chauffeur her to and from her day care appointments too. I know I’ll driving everywhere once her father passes away (not that I mind).

All I’m really trying to say is I miss me, doing what I want when I want.

I hope I’m not coming across as selfish or anything, but I think it’s something I do deserve.

Xo

Ugh Again

Yup here we go again, another fun filled weekend. Actually it’s nothing like that and it seems all my plans are made for me to chauffeur everyone around cause one can’t drive and it seems that the other one won’t drive. That means whatever I want to do, I had better do it quick. I’m not really impressed by that.It’s like the more freedom I want to do things on my own the tighter the chain.
Frick seems my computers acting up now.
I’ve given up complaining about the idiots at work. No one listens to me or they just laugh at me. Not that I am joining them, rather waiting for karma to do it’s job.
Kinda pissed off cause last night was the third weekend in a row I had to pay for supper. $55 each weekend and all I get is thanks. Kinda stupid cause i did some of the cooking this week too.
Also had a dream I won the lottery last night…too bad was only a dream- better lucknext time.
OK enough bitching off to refill my coffee and decide what I am going to try and do today, and hope its notas bad as I think it will be.
ciao xo

Ouch: Not again

IMG_2416.JPG I really don’t know what I did to myself, but once again I find myself in pain. It happened sometime after physiotherapy on Wednesday. Maybe it was from the exercises of going down stairs, but what ever it is my right ankle is extremely sore; on the bottom as well as both sides. I really hope its something like a pulled muscle that will go away, since it does feel a little better than yesterday.
I was planning on being cane free by the end of the month (my little mishap above hopefully won’t change that).
Oh well get well quick to me again think I’ll go shop for a suit of bubble wrap lol

No idea what’s in store for today. I wanted to (more like need to) get a new dead bolt for the front door as my mother lost her copy of the key somewhere outside our place in the winter. It wouldn’t be so bad, but it had my name on it (her fault). I don’t think it will be that hard to install as there is already a hole there so should line up properly. Will just need to make sure everyone who needs one will get a copy of a key.

I think I finally have decided what sort of tattoo I would like on my forearm. Its more of fill in the blanks between tattoos. I was thinking stars and planets with some shading. either that or a bunch of crows … ok so maybe not 100% but for now I am at least 80%. I will sleep on it again for  little while as I doubt Ii will be getting it today.

OK time for more caffeine and well do something.

Have a good one.

ciao xo

Happy Anniversary

Wow I can’t believe I almost forgot about this. I’m actually proud of myself. I was tempted so many times early on of course and in the past couple months too dealing with my fiancé’s depression and my broken knee. I’m just glad I didn’t give in.

Next reward for this is a new tattoo (stay tuned).

Yay me again – ciao xo